Kids and the Internet: Frequently asked questions

Children go online at younger and younger ages—in fact, the fastest growing segment of Internet users is now pre-schoolers. Many kids are using the Internet at school by the time they are 6 years old, so they'll probably want to go online at home around this age as well. Children under 10, however, generally don't have the critical thinking skills to be online alone, so you must be totally involved when kids younger than 10 use the Internet. Sit with them whenever they are online. Make sure they only go to sites you have chosen. Teach them to never share personal information over the Internet. To learn more about what you can do, read A parent's guide to online safety: Ages and stages.

Young children should share a family e-mail address rather than have their own accounts. As they get older and want more independence, you can give them their own address. The mail can still reside in your family inbox, so you can ask about any suspicious-looking messages your child might receive. Ask your Internet Service Provider (ISP) what options it provides for family e-mail accounts and use e-mail filters to help prevent the delivery of spam, unsolicited messages, and fraudulent e-mail designed to steal your personal information.

Negotiate an online agreement with your kids that outlines the rights and obligations of computer use at home. Make sure the agreement clearly states:

Your children's input is critical to the success of the agreement. Print it out and keep it by the family computer to remind everyone of the rules. Review it regularly, and update it as your kids get older. To learn more about house rules for Internet use, read Using family contracts to help protect your kids online.

Children under 13 need permission from their parents to use MSN Messenger because they also need a Hotmail account to be able to register for instant messaging, also called IM. (If you are under 13 and you live in the United States, you need a parent's permission to sign up for a Hotmail account.) When kids start using MSN Messenger, your role is to help them with safety guidelines and privacy protection, and to encourage responsible use of the technology.

Here are some suggested rules for using MSN Messenger:

For more safety and privacy tips, read 10 tips for safer instant messaging.

To learn more about the parental controls in MSN Messenger, read Use MSN Messenger to stay up-to-date and in control.

Yes, MSN Messenger is set up to automatically save instant messaging conversations in a folder on your computer. The default location for this folder is usually in: C:\My Documents\. (To see exactly where the folder is, open MSN Messenger, click the Tools menu, click Options, and then go to the Messages tab.)

Keep in mind that it's easy for kids to disable the feature that saves IM conversations. In the end, a good open dialogue with your kids is much more constructive than if you spy on them. They will always be one step ahead of us when it comes to technology. You need to get good rules in place, trust that your kids will follow them, and actively review the rules with your children.

The easiest way to avoid pop-ups is to use software that blocks pop-ups. If you have the most updated version of Windows XP, Internet Explorer (your Web browser) is already equipped with a pop-up blocker. If you don't use Windows XP, you can download a free toolbar that includes a pop-up blocker, such as the MSN Toolbar.

The Internet is a wonderful tool for young people, especially for those who have difficulties with peer interaction. Computer-savvy kids can shine on the Internet because looks and athletic ability are not important, and this can help build their self-esteem. However, excessive computer use may further isolate shy kids from their peers or take away from other activities such as homework, exercise, sleep, or the opportunity to spend time with others. Parents and teachers are often unaware that there is a problem until it is serious. This is because it is easy to hide online activities and because Internet addiction is not yet widely recognized.

Establish rules around home computer use and try to balance it with more physical activity. Also, make sure your Internet-connected computer is out in the open, not in your child's room.

Finally, look at your own Internet use. Do you spend hours online? If you do, your children are likely to follow your example. For tips on how to help your kids establish a healthy balance between Internet use and other activities, read Are your kids addicted to the Internet?

A virus is a malicious software program that infects computer files or hard disk drives and then makes copies of itself. Many of the activities that kids do online can leave computers vulnerable to viruses. E-mail attachments are the most common means of distributing viruses, but viruses can also be downloaded using file-sharing and instant messaging programs.

Make sure your children understand the following:

You can help protect your computer by if you always run up-to-date firewall and antivirus software, and periodically scan your computer for spyware or other unwanted software and immediately remove it.

Yes, there are ways you can track where they've been online, but be aware that computer-savvy kids know how to cover their Internet tracks. It's more effective to have clear rules about Internet use and to communicate openly with your kids.

When you surf the Internet, your Web browser (such as Microsoft Internet Explorer or Netscape Navigator) collects information about the places you visit and stores it on your computer.

Browsers usually keep a history of recently visited sites. Most versions of Internet Explorer have a History button on the top toolbar. If you don't see the button, or if you are a Netscape Navigator user, simply press the Ctrl (control) and H keys at the same time, which will also bring up your history list. Double-click any item in your history list to view the site.

Browsers also make temporary copies of Web pages, known as cache files, and store them on your computer.

To view your temporary files in Internet Explorer:

You should see a list of Web pages you or your child has recently visited, as well as images you saw and cookies that were placed on your computer.

There are also many kinds of software that will let you monitor various online activities, for example MSN Premium offers a set of parental controls that allow you to filter the Internet and will send you weekly activity reports that detail where your children went on the Internet, people they chatted with, and more.

You can also check out a good computer store and ask what products they recommend.

This is often referred to as cyberbullying or griefing and it has become common among teenagers. If harassment occurs, you can block the person who sends the messages with the block options that come in many e-mail and instant messaging programs. Save any e-mail messages that include harassment and forward them to your e-mail service provider. Most providers have appropriate use policies that prohibit harassment.

Kids can also be harassed and cyberbullied while playing online video games. To learn more about what you can do to help keep video gaming safe and fun for your kids, read 10 tips to deal with game cyberbullies and griefers.

If the harassment consists of comments posted on a Web site, contact your Internet Service Provider (ISP) and ask for help to locate the ISP that hosts the site. You can then contact the ISP and bring the offensive comments to their attention. You should also contact your local police department. Harassment is a crime, both in the real world and on the Internet. It is illegal to communicate repeatedly with someone if your communication causes them to fear for their own safety or the safety of others.

Filtering tools may be helpful with young children, to complement—not replace—parental supervision. Filters and blockers, however, are not foolproof, and they often fail to keep out inappropriate material. They can also block a lot of useful content, which your kids might need for their school assignments.

While filters can be useful when your kids are young, as they grow older they need to develop safe and responsible online behavior.

Before you allow your teenager to use your credit card online, you should give him clear guidelines about shopping online and what to look for to help keep their transactions safe and secure.

Teach him what to look for on a Web site that might indicate that it's all right to give credit card information to the site. Before he shops on a Web site, look for:

The items listed above can be forged, so it's important to encourage your children to ask you before they make any purchases online so you can be the final judge as to whether a Web site is safe or not. Make sure your browser supports 128-bit encryption so that your credit card number is automatically encrypted, or scrambled, before it is sent. (The latest versions of both Internet Explorer and Netscape Navigator support 128-bit encryption.) For more information about how to shop safely online, read Should you trust that online store?

A Web site privacy policy outlines how the site uses, shares, and retains the personal information it collects. It's important for parents to read a Web site's privacy policy and show their children what to look for in a privacy policy before giving out any personal information. Sometimes these policies can be lengthy, complex, and vague.

If the Web site doesn't have a privacy policy or statement, use caution when shopping or providing personal information on that Web site.

When you read a privacy policy, you want to know: